When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
Randomize
