He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
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