Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
