Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Randomize
