this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
Randomize
