God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Randomize
