I just gift wrapped bread.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
Randomize
