As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
