I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
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