Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
