before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
