I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
