Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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