Sry I called you an 8
I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
