Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
Panties = found
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Randomize
