he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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