xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
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