you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
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