i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Randomize
