I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
Randomize
