Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
You peed on a flamingo?!?
Randomize
