she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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