Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
Randomize