i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
