I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
Randomize
