I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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