K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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