I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Randomize