It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
Randomize
