On valentines day I took a girl on a date that I suspect was homeless
Buhtt sex?
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
Randomize
