Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
I'm drive I can fine osifer
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
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