So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
