Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
I think a kid would responsible me up
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
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