i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Randomize
