my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
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