it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
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