would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
Randomize
