So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
You dont lie about slip and slides
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
