My Higher Power is John Stamos
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
If I die, sorry about rent.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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