oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Randomize
