he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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