you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
YAS. BRING CRAB.
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize
