I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
Randomize
