Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
Randomize
