Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize
