He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
Randomize
