Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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