haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
Randomize