I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize
