I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
